Destruction. Fire. The whole world burns. Spirits scream, then fall silent. Everything is silent. No whisper of wind, no wail from the distance. No rustle of leaves. No smell of Green. No smell of Other. Just silence, and nothingness. As the world was, and as it should be. A lone figure lies on the barren ground. It is an elf one moment, but seems more human the next. Then, it is a dragon, scales dull and grey. The ever changing figure lies still, and silently. It sleeps deeply, the silence, the lack of scents, the lack of anything, allowing it to truly sleep for the first time. The silence continues, and the figure sleeps on.
Te'Nala's eyes snap open. Her ears perk, and rotate, listening for sounds. Her nose scrunches. There, the smell of Green from Tomah, the sound of his breathing. The wail of a far off spirit. A dream, just a dream.. What does it mean?She silently stares at the ceiling. He said any of my dreams would be my own. But that didn't feel like my own.. Should I wake him?She watches him sleeping, and sighs. No use waking him now.. I'll tell him in the morning..
Te'Nala snuggles again her large husband, and soon loses herself to the land of dreams once more.
Monday, January 4, 2010
But Home is So Warm..
I have to return to Northrend. I've been putting it off for far too long. I am needed up there, and I can't forsake my duties. It's hard, though, to be in Northrend. It's like the entire continent screams, the voices of the dead drown out everything else. And slowly, the spirits begin to close in on those that they know can hear them, begging them, or taunting, threatening, or just following, not even knowing why.. The dragons, so many of them. It's almost worse than the humanoids, and such. It's so hard to ignore them.
But I have meditated for the last few days. The Light will protect me, will keep them from seeing me. And will keep me from hearing them. I hope it will. I have faith, I have to.
I don't want to go.
But I have meditated for the last few days. The Light will protect me, will keep them from seeing me. And will keep me from hearing them. I hope it will. I have faith, I have to.
I don't want to go.
The Lunatic's Den
Astenya was put on trial for killing some jerk who Lindiwe was a whore with. Tomahna turned the tables, and tried to put Lindiwe on trial. It was rather clever, and I think people will take him more seriously. Vileblossom warned him that he could get killed for it, or something. While I do worry people will see him as more of a threat now, I'm not worried. I mean, I've seen him survive a hell of a lot. And avoid even worse. And if he doesn't survive something, I'd like to meet the person who can keep a soul away from me. Well, I mean, I'm sure like, Elune or the Lich King could. But I don't think he's pissed off anyone on speaking terms with them, so I should be able to keep him alive or ... whatever I need to do. I bet *a crossed out 'Ll'* Tynera could help me put his soul into a tree, or something; make him an elemental..
Oh! Oh, oh oh. Right. Tynera. Llilith was apparently not only not dead, but a relative of mine. She found Tomah, and they talked about things, and we met again last night. She told me some things I wouldn't believe normally. But she was obviously telling the truth about herself, and as for me.. It fits. The Dream, the Nightmare, the damned Whelps. It fits. And.. I suppose it doesn't do imuch. I mean, I may have a Connection, but no more actual natural talent than Tomah. Well, a lot less, since it took so long to manifest. Hell, his manifested even though it was rare amongst his kind at the time. And half-elves are a bit notorious for being the only kind of non'kal'dorei elves to become druids. So really, I guess in the long run, it doesn't matter.
Well, having family matters, I suppose. Not in the "Oh, after all these years, I learn Llilith was related to me, and I may have other living family" way, but in the "The woman I love and raised me is alive, and has been watching over me." way. I never cared if we were blood. She raised me, and I love her.
So, anywho. Lindiwe is a whore, and Lindiwe and Astenya both need to stop being idiots. Life is so short. I can't believe this is how they want to spend it.
Oh! Oh, oh oh. Right. Tynera. Llilith was apparently not only not dead, but a relative of mine. She found Tomah, and they talked about things, and we met again last night. She told me some things I wouldn't believe normally. But she was obviously telling the truth about herself, and as for me.. It fits. The Dream, the Nightmare, the damned Whelps. It fits. And.. I suppose it doesn't do imuch. I mean, I may have a Connection, but no more actual natural talent than Tomah. Well, a lot less, since it took so long to manifest. Hell, his manifested even though it was rare amongst his kind at the time. And half-elves are a bit notorious for being the only kind of non'kal'dorei elves to become druids. So really, I guess in the long run, it doesn't matter.
Well, having family matters, I suppose. Not in the "Oh, after all these years, I learn Llilith was related to me, and I may have other living family" way, but in the "The woman I love and raised me is alive, and has been watching over me." way. I never cared if we were blood. She raised me, and I love her.
So, anywho. Lindiwe is a whore, and Lindiwe and Astenya both need to stop being idiots. Life is so short. I can't believe this is how they want to spend it.
A Wedding
Farikess is annoying. She refused to leave during the ceremony, darting and flipping around the whole while. I think Ysmira is a very bad influence on her. Why can't she be more like Murigos? Or hell, even Jo-Jo, bless her dumb little heart? And why do these dragon whelps have to keep deciding I'm their damn mother! Stupid.. dragons..
*The rest of the page is taken up with drawings of her whelps, and two drakes. There are a few scribbled, illegible notes*
*The rest of the page is taken up with drawings of her whelps, and two drakes. There are a few scribbled, illegible notes*
Crippled
How was I supposed to know that he didn't know? He's seen me play the lute.. but.. I suppose he wouldn't know how well I could play before, or really anything about it.. But still,. I mean, I can barely hold a dagger properly, how could he not know?
He can't read my mind. But I wish like mad I never had to tell him that. I wish he never recognized me. I don't care that I then recognized him. I only care that he lives with that pain, that knowledge of what he did to me, every day. I can't stand him feeling like that.
And no matter what he says, I can't help but wonder if everything he does for me, is some sort of apology, is trying to make it up to me.
He can't read my mind. But I wish like mad I never had to tell him that. I wish he never recognized me. I don't care that I then recognized him. I only care that he lives with that pain, that knowledge of what he did to me, every day. I can't stand him feeling like that.
And no matter what he says, I can't help but wonder if everything he does for me, is some sort of apology, is trying to make it up to me.
Bleeding Out?
I'm sitting up against a tree in the middle of nowhere. I'm still wearing my dress; it's soaked from the rain. I don't know what happened to my shoes. I can't feel my toes anymore. I don't even have the light my eyes cast to see by, because they haven't begun to glow again since I had my surgery. And I've tried. I could cast something, but I can't waste my resources on that. So I'm writing in the dark, on damp paper, with a pen that was snapped in half. I'm not even sure the ink is sticking to the page. Why am I even writing right now? I should be trying to get home. But I can't. I need to sit. I need to think.
Why is it me? I can remember being little, and this happening. I remember that Llilith didn't believe me at first. She thought I just had a vivid imagination. Until one day I was able to prove it. They way I did.. I wish it hadn't been like that. I wish.. I barely even remember it now, except the boy. I can't remember what he looked like when he was alive. But I remember him, lying on the ground, the blood...
She believed me then. She told me not to tell people. That I could get in trouble. I wasn't sure why. But now I know. She was protecting me. "Getting in trouble" is putting it lightly. Back then... Things weren't the same. I say this like I'm so old. It's amazing how things change, though. Look at the elves, working with trolls and orcs. Humans and space goats..
Space goats? What am I rambling about? I need to get home, Tomah.. Damn, he won't be home. He'll be looking for me. I need to stay put. I need to let him sniff me out. It shouldn't be that hard. It isn't like this is the first time he's had to do it.
Why is it me? I can remember being little, and this happening. I remember that Llilith didn't believe me at first. She thought I just had a vivid imagination. Until one day I was able to prove it. They way I did.. I wish it hadn't been like that. I wish.. I barely even remember it now, except the boy. I can't remember what he looked like when he was alive. But I remember him, lying on the ground, the blood...
She believed me then. She told me not to tell people. That I could get in trouble. I wasn't sure why. But now I know. She was protecting me. "Getting in trouble" is putting it lightly. Back then... Things weren't the same. I say this like I'm so old. It's amazing how things change, though. Look at the elves, working with trolls and orcs. Humans and space goats..
Space goats? What am I rambling about? I need to get home, Tomah.. Damn, he won't be home. He'll be looking for me. I need to stay put. I need to let him sniff me out. It shouldn't be that hard. It isn't like this is the first time he's had to do it.
Damn Darkmoons
Well, I was apparently poisoned by the Darkmoon Faire. I'm a bit surprised, but not too much. I had some memory troubles, and for a time, thought it was just after the baby again. I have been thinking about things a lot. My name, my age, Llilith.. my real family. I don't know so much. I'm thinking about trying to contact Llilith's ghost again. It's never worked before, but.. Perhaps Sazuul can help me? I just don't know anymore..
Owakeri was injured, and I let him get away twice. I'm not as worried now as I was last night. I can't believe we wouldn't have heard something if something had happened to him last night after he left. I got rather mad at the time, though, and broke Tomahna's foot. I felt terrible after. He, of course, has already forgiven me. It's rather unfair, that he seems to think that I can never do worse than he's done to me. I don't know. I don't understand how he can put up with me.
Tomahna offered to share his name with me. His mother's name, Darkhorn. It doesn't seem right to take the name of a Grimtotem like that. I suppose that makes no sense, I am marrying one..
Owakeri was injured, and I let him get away twice. I'm not as worried now as I was last night. I can't believe we wouldn't have heard something if something had happened to him last night after he left. I got rather mad at the time, though, and broke Tomahna's foot. I felt terrible after. He, of course, has already forgiven me. It's rather unfair, that he seems to think that I can never do worse than he's done to me. I don't know. I don't understand how he can put up with me.
Tomahna offered to share his name with me. His mother's name, Darkhorn. It doesn't seem right to take the name of a Grimtotem like that. I suppose that makes no sense, I am marrying one..
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